I'm so blessed to have some fiercely inspiring female friendships in my life.
I was honored to be featured as the June Goddess in my dear friend Iris Nabalo’s series The Year of the Goddess in 2015. Here is the full article:
Gentleness Inspired Bravery
I was raised to go to college.
I knew I could succeed at this academic game. Sprinkle in some stubbornness and a knack for competitiveness and you've got yourself a girl who wanted more than anything to be a scholar with a "bright future ahead of her."
And while playing the scholarship game, I got tunnel vision looking down at my feet.
First step, get into the right schools. Another step, get the right internship with the right companies, another step, get into the right MBA program... make friends with the professors... work with the bigger brands and corporations... become a thought leader in your field. Step after step after step and then suddenly I look up and I didn’t know. I was totally disconnected from nourishment. I'm surviving on bad coffee and shallow compliments of someone doing my same job but with more years under their belt.
Unfortunately fear conquered me in this situation and I did not listen to the all knowing voice who would generously send advice my way. A woman’s intuition is dangerous to ignore because that is when we get into trouble (women, I know you know what I mean).
I would later come to fall in love with this voice and call her Intuition.
She got me to look up and say “Where the fuck am I going?” and then "Whatever is down this road seems very anticlimactic...” But all the steps I had to take were NOT minor so I pushed her aside. Time, tuition, expectations, tears, sweat and relationships all depending on "the plan” I had promised to execute. The weight of disappointing those closest to me was heavy on my shoulders. So much that I really started to decline in my spirit. I fell into a zombie like state because facing the truth of not living my life fully was too difficult to look at in the eye. That would require a lot of bravery that I didn’t have yet.
I understand all too well the fear of saying I don't know. I don't have things figured out. Things didn't go according to plan. Why? Because it didn't FEEL right.That's really fucking scary to say out loud for the first time. But here is how I did it… I embraced gentleness towards myself.
Gentleness looks like a few things to me, like writing yourself a love letter that sounds like it comes from an encouraging friend. It means making time to cultivate relationships with smart and strong women. Or giving myself permission to hold sacred space no one else was allowed into unless this person really understood the new path I was building for myself. It was falling in love with myself.
I needed to embrace being gentle and gracious with myself if I was going to be able to move on to my greatness. Gentleness is like the homemaker that prepares a comfortable stay for courage. Courage can make herself at home and blossom into bravery.
When you have bravery and a strong intuition nothing will stop you sister.